The Invasion (Oliver Hirschbiegel, 2007)

Cowardly, simpering third remake of the perennial sci-fi classic, by far the least engaging, least interesting of the four Bodysnatcher films.

A pointless, porcelain Nicole Kidman stars as an indestructible super-mum, battling to save her MacGuffin son from waves of soulless alien 'pod' people, who this time round have foregone the iconic giant seed pods and instead prefer to transform their victims by means of a liquid (and sometimes projectile-vomited) virus.

Clearly uncomfortable with the original concept's inherent slow pace and talkiness, this film reveals the alien's ploy halfway through, devoting the rest of the time to protracted car chases and tedious gunplay.

Some clever minor details, and an effective if predictable framing of today's political climate add some interest, but are undone by gratuitous product placement, yet more 28 Days Later-style running zombie crowds, globs of conveniently-delivered idiot pseudo-science and the ultimate cardinal sin - a patronising happy ending.

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Die Hard 2 (Renny Harlin, 1990)

Spirited if misguided attempt at improving the original by ramping up the action, threat and scope of the story, destroying in the process much of what made the first one great. A film clearly far too ambitious for the writers and directors who worked on it, Die Hard 2 is sprawling, aimless and full of hundreds of screeching unsympathetic minor characters. This time we find Detective John McClane battling a confused mix of military, mercanery and drug lord against the admittedly atmospheric background of a Christmas-time Dulles International Airport. The tense stand-offs of the first film are replaced with countless nonsensical overlong gun battles, the unique locations with huts and tunnels and the charasmatic villains with silly action figures. A few clever moments and pretty snowscapes raise the film now and then, but it's never more than a minute or two away from its noisy, clumsy roots.

Manhunter (Michael Mann, 1986)

Extremely effective, genuinely tense and intelligently constructed serial killer film, elevated way above the norm by Michael Mann's elegant direction, a strong cast, gorgeous photography and a moodily evocative synthesised soundtrack. Sensibly reigning in the more over-the-top moments of Thomas Harris' original novel, Manhunter is far more than the sum of its parts; managaing to be chilling, haunting, funny and thrilling by turn, succeeding everywhere the increasingly cynical and ridiculous sequels/remakes failed to do.

Phone Me If You're Bored (Aidan Smith and his Indulgent Friends, 2014)

Aidan Smith is back, Indulgent Friends in tow, for another slipshod, ramshackle excursion into love, loss and absurdity.

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